Of Christmas and Break ups.

Here are days 2 and 3.

Day One
Breakfast Black coffee or tea (Sweet & Low or Equal) or water 1/2 Grapefruit or Juice Changed to Orange. 1 slice toast with 1 Tbsp. Peanut Butter Changed to small amount of butter and low fat cheese.	Lunch 1/2 Cup of Tuna Changed to Cottage Cheese. 1 slice toast Black coffee or tea (Sweet & Low or Equal) or water	Dinner 3 oz. any lean meat. No meat. 1 cup green beans No access to stove. 1 cup carrots Forgot to pack them. 1 cup vanilla ice cream 1 medium apple No access to apple. Black coffee or tea (Sweet & Low or Equal) or water

Day Two
Breakfast Black coffee or tea (Sweet & Low or Equal) or water 1 egg (any style) Egg white omelet. 1 slice toast 1 banana	Lunch 1 cup cottage cheese or tuna 5 saltine crackers Black coffee or tea (Sweet & Low or Equal) or water	Dinner 2 beef franks or hot dogs Changed to egg white omelet - ate half. 1/2 cup carrots 1 banana No banana. 1 cup broccoli or cabbage Changed to Cauliflower and carrots. 1/2 cup vanilla ice cream Try 1/4 cup Black coffee or tea (Sweet & Low or Equal) or water

I lost. 2 lbs. I now weigh 109 lbs or 49.5 kg.
And that is with a stupid period.


2 days ago, I found out that my cohabitant of a boyfriend met up with his Xgirl, while I was on vacation
in my home country this summer. It hit hard. Especially since I asked him 2 days ago if they still kept in touch.
He said no. And he didn't tell me because he knows I am super duper jealous.  I flipped.

But, he would never cheat, I know that, and I know they just met as friends but it still hurt. Oh yeah, I found out by reading his facebook massages. I know - It's bad.
So, he got insanely upset when I texted him my findings and what I had done.
He told me to get the fuck out and that I was a little b****. (Well at least I wasn't a big b****)
I stayed the night at a cheap motel - close to home - I decided that we were indeed done and over.  Preferably both.
He was on the same page. SAD COUPLE - BREAKING UP ON CHRISTMAS.
However, it hurt so much after we decided our fate, that I started to cry and I couldn't stop. It hurt so badly.
I don't know what happened but he reached out a hand and hugged me and that was the point when this fight was over.

Was I wrong to check messages - YES. Was he wrong for not telling me - YES.
It has come to the point where he basically can do anything to me but I cannot walk away - because I love him too much. I don't trust him in some ways and I trust him too much in other ways.
I have to work on my bad parts - No more spying or sneaking around - it only hurts me and us as a couple.
Ignorance is bliss. 

So, I followed my diet the best I could but it is hard without having access to a kitchen or the ingredients.
Now, It is back to normal - 1000 calories and then I may take the 3 day diet up again on the 27th - it felt extremely GOOD not to count every single calorie. I liked it.

Today's intake:
Breakfast - Cereal and buttermilk -- 120.





Next weeks goal / last day of 2010 / 107 lbs - 48.5 kg.